In our life we meet couthroughntless people...some we never get to say more than a simple hello...others we get to unchain their souls. Three years ago today I lost someone who knew where all the hidden keys were located. She could pop a lock even without the key present. She understood that inside of me was this bright gem just dying to sparkle.
Although, in four years of College I got to meet and be the person to unlock others souls. Though I suppose I feel bad for never fully unlocking mine. Some parts may be because after losing her I was afaird of the secrets and the pain to come flying out. Prehaps...it was just me being stubborn me.
In my life I have withheld a lot from people. I suppose it was my way of protecting myself or maybe I have always had this random idea of being a burden. I suppose this idea came from my father. It seemed like he had to forget his promises because I was just another thing on his to do list. Now, my step-father has tried all he could to fix that but I suppose for some reason it still remains.
If we have ever gone to school together throughout our lives and you've felt like I never understood you. Chances are I did, but I was too afaird to let you understand also. If we went to school and you ever really cared but never had the time to show it I appreciate it. I appreciate all you did have the time to do. If you ever wonder if I think about you I do. It may not be everyday but their is that one song or that one color that reminds me of you. If you ever called me your friend I hope I was qualified and served my purpose. If you ever see me around and I seem cold or frozen I'm sorry.
I only strive to make a difference in the lives of everyone I meet. I suppose this was a lofty goal I concieved years ago. I suppose after going through so much pain I only wanted to be able to bring people the happiness that so alluded me. For 12 years I had a huge ball of Happiness in my best friend and after her I am tryin' to pick up the pieces to still discover it again.
If you ever wonder if I want you to succeed...absolutly. If you ever thought I was weird, ugly, annoying: I'm sure I gave you justice but I want you to know that I still want the best. If you think this is all a lie I hope you think twice.
Remember that we were made to build realationships of all degrees. So even if I'm someone who only pinchs the surface or I'm someone who gets to dive deep into your soul. Know I appreciate the time we've had or are having and I want to thank you for taking a chance on me.
God Bless and remember to Love and cherish the moments you have in your life!!
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